“Comparison is the thief of joy”
Why do we compare? Does it give us satisfaction? Maybe. Does it make us go crazy? Sometimes. Does it push us to better our lives? In some cases, yes. Does it add any value or joy to our lives? No.
I will admit, I compare my life to others a lot. I am not proud of it. In the world of social media, I find it very hard to stop comparing. Since having a baby, I found myself comparing him to other babies around his age, searching for what milestones they had or had not accomplished yet. I know that they are individuals, grow at their own pace and/or have other reasons to where they are at in life.. but I still did it.
After Porter was born, I started following other mama’s who had a baby around the same time (Instagram is really good at doing this for you without even searching). I was a new mom and following someone else going through the same life changing experience as me, was comforting.
Comforting is not the word I would use today. I feel guilt, sadness, and sometimes anger. I feel that I am not a good mom at times because my son hasn’t hit a certain milestone. Am I not giving him what he needs? Should I be at home more and not at work? I thought a lot about this and realized that overthinking the things that he hasn’t done yet is taking the joy away from me watching him grow as a person on his own path. A friend also helped me with this realization as she mentioned how social media has had an impact on her journey. You can be the strongest person and it can still get to you. She taught me that a parent and child’s journey is no ones else’s but their own and to not let comparison get in the way.
I talked a lot about comparing my child’s life to others, but it doesn’t end there. Aside from the most common comparison (body image), I have compared my job, home, car and even my freaking dogs!. I have a problem, and I know there are others like me hiding behind their phones or computers that feel the same way. We need to STOP this and enjoy our lives again like we did before social media.
Comparison will not disappear from our lives completely but we can work on ways to better ourselves by living our OWN life, not the life of that person you follow on Instagram.
Do you compare yourself to others? Tell me your stories, your thoughts or what you have done to make it stop. I look forward to hearing from you! Have a great weekend 🙂